This was, hands down, the best episode so far in this season. Bromances are destroyed, friendships are deepened, people are killed, slaves are freed, and dragons are set upon evil people. What more could we have asked for?
Along some road travelling to King Robb, Jaime Lannister is depressed over his lost hand. I mean to be fair, he’s lost his sword hand, and that’s like all he’s ever known. Plus being beaten up by Bolton and his men isn’t much fun either. But Brienne is aware of his heroics from last episode. She knows he saved her from being raped. But she’s not all thanks and goo goo eyes, she wants him to fight and man up. Honestly, I think this is what he needed to hear. There’s not much that’s going to get him back on his feet, revenge is one of the few things.
In King’s Landing, we’ve got some interesting things happening. Tyrion talks with Varys for advice on Cersei, but more importantly we get some information about Varys’ past. We learn he was bought by a street traveler who turned out to be a sorcerer that ended up cutting off his balls and burning them for a ritual. As payback, Varys was patient and rose to a spot of power. He shows Tyrion that he’s captured the sorcerer and has gotten him to exact the revenge for losing his man bits. Good for Varys.
He’s also just as curious as Bronn and Tyrion about Podrick’s dealings with the prostitutes, but that’s probably going to get more attention in the future, one can hope. He’s making inquiries into Littlefinger’s movements, and we find out that he has ordered for two feather beds not just one for his ship that will make the journey to the Aery.
Margaery is getting her claws deep into Joffrey, much to Cersei’s dismay, and has got him waving to his people and smiling at her. It’s all just manipulation, but at least he’s getting to see his people? For her part, I appreciate her efforts, and I appreciate Olenna’s dry wit. Her meeting with Varys, if nothing, was entertaining. And Margaery meeting with Sansa, giving rise to some hope in this poor girl’s life, was pretty much the most adorable thing ever. Sadly, things are moving for Sansa that are beyond her control, as always. Good thing half of King’s Landing is on her side. And let’s be real, she’s by far one of my favorite characters. I know people hate her, and they call her names and what not, but she’s the one who is going to survive all of this and leave with the least scars. Meanwhile, the rest of her family… well, let’s not go into that.
From Craster’s home/village in the North, we get some pretty crazy shit that goes down. There’s obviously some dissemination going on in the ranks, there has been for a long time. Not everyone likes the way Lord Commander Mormont has been running things, especially not now that they’re sniveling for food from Craster. Sam preoccupies himself with saving Gilly, who’s given birth to a male child. He doesn’t have much time for this though, since rebellion and some semi-deserting goes on in the ranks of the Night’s Watch. Owen Harper aka Burn Gorman plays a vengeful and hungry Night’s Watchmen who turns his blade upon Craster and basically starts a rebellion. Caught in the crossfires is the Lord Commander! Sam manages to run away with Gilly, but for how long will they survive!?
Now, every time I see Bran running around, I think he’s got his legs back. I know it’s a dream, and that they are still somewhere in the North, and he’s being carted around, but a girl can dream. Anyways, he dreams again of the three-eyed crow and sees Jojen in his dreams again. However that’s about as much as we get. He and Jojen share a bond, maybe over a three-eyed crow, maybe over wargy things. Who knows?
No longer in a dungeon, Ramsay tricks Theon into going back to his sister’s, when really he’s just bringing him back to the dungeon where he originally escaped. They’re starting to reveal just who Ramsay is and how bad he’s going to get, but not yet. Not yet. Theon reveals some pretty heavy regret for his actions, and has a sad moment, but he can’t turn back the clock. Winterfell is in ashes because of him. So, now he’s going to get tortured again, this time with no prospect of release.
In some cave, we find Arya, Gendry, the Hound, and the Brotherhood gathered to try the Hound for his misdoings, though it seems that they are just doing this because of his family name. Though we all know that it’s the elder Clegane who is the evil one, and Sandor is merely a man who obeys orders. Unfortunately, Arya doesn’t see it like this. The Hound killed the nice butcher’s boy from Season 1 for her own misdoings, and therefore he killed innocents. He’s sentenced to a trial by combat, facing none other than the leader of the Brotherhood, Ser Beric! Though, I’m a little confused, are they also worshipers of the Lord of the Light?
The day has finally come in Astapor, for Daenerys to receive her slave warriors, the Unsullied. Even for someone who knew what would happen, this scene was badass. I feel like it should have been obvious to the grand master slavers that a person from the blood of High Valyerian could speak the language, but I guess not. She gives him Drogon as payment for the entire Unsullied army, but as she receives the whip, she turns on them. Telling the Unsullied to kill all of the slavers who hold whips, leaving the children alive, and then goes on to set the entire city to flames with her dragons. After that awesome sacking, she takes the army and her Khalasar with her to the next stop. Before leaving, she frees all of her slaves and allows them to leave should they choose to. Obviously none of them go, and they stay to fight as free men.
Best last scene ever, am I right?