Breaking Bad: To’hajiilee (5×13)
Synopsis: Jesse’s plan pans out, for better or worse, and we’re left with the cruelest cliff-hanger yet. Everything hurts and no one was ever happy again.
Rating: ★★★★☆
Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit! There hasn’t been another show out there that makes me scream and flail at my television as much as Breaking Bad does – and with three episodes left, there’s been a lot of flailing and screaming going on. In the opening of To’hajiilee, we see Todd desperately trying to fill Walt’s shoes. But his Uncle is no Jesse and Lydia just can’t accept the lack of blue hue of the meth that Todd has been producing. He gets uncomfortably close to her in an attempt to reassure her before she leaves. Walt calls him, his ringtone is hilariously She Blinded Me With Science, and informs him that the target that his Uncle needs to take care of is Jesse Pinkman and the credits roll.
Hank and Gomez meet up after the failed sting to talk about what the hell to do next. Jesse tells them that Walt would never give up his money and that’s the evidence they can use to get him. Walt is never going to tell them where it is, but Jesse gives them Huell, thinking he might know something. After putting him in a safe house, Hank goes to talk to him and spins a great tale about how Walt killed Jesse – flashing a picture they’d earlier staged – and Kuby, Huell would be next, and Saul was helping Walt only to save himself.
Poor Huell is so confused and doesn’t really know what to think, but Hank persists and shows why he really is a good officer – even if he does some questionable things at times to get results. Huell keeps telling them he doesn’t know where the money is, but describes to them the seven black barrels full of money that he gave to Walt and the rental van he delivered them in. He goes on to explain that the van needed to be washed because it had been dirty and he also saw Walt remove a shovel when he left it with them. This gives Hank and Gomez enough of a lead to work off of and they leave, reminding him again not to contact Saul or Walt.
Elsewhere, Walt is meeting with Todd’s Uncle, who asks if they are talking “rat patrol” when it comes to Jesse clean-up. Walt says no, but that he won’t listen to reason and he’s angry. He goes on to say that Jesse is like family to him and he wants the hit to be quick and painless, without suffering and fear. He continues to be way more attached to Jesse than his own son – what does this mean for Walt Jr.??? As the series gets closer to ending, I get more and more worried for Walt’s kids.
Todd’s Uncle doesn’t want money for the hit, but he wants Walt to cook for them. At first, Walt refuses to tutor Todd to help him get the purity and color correct, offering more money instead, but the Uncle holds stubborn – the price is that Walt has to cook for them. He finally agrees that he’ll cook with them once after the job is done. When they ask where to find Jesse, Walt has to admit that he didn’t know, but that he knew how to flush Jesse out.
So, Walt has the nerve to go to Andrea’s house, where she and Brock are eating breakfast. Andrea lets Walt in on the pretense of him being worried about Jesse and when she re-introduces him to Brock, the poor boy looks so intimidated. He has to know Walt was the one who poisoned him. Moving away from Brock, he tells Andrea that he can’t get ahold of Jesse and he’s worried that Jesse is using again. Andrea hasn’t heard from him in two weeks, asking if he’s called the police or Saul Goodman. Walt claims they had an argument and he’s hoping that Jesse was just mad at him, so Andrea offers to call Jesse for him.
Walt’s got the Hello Kitty phone number all ready for her and she leaves Jesse a message. Unfortunately for Walt, Hank’s still got control of the Hello Kitty phone and listens to the message. He echoes Jesse’s sentiments from the last episode and says, “Nice try, asshole.” Before going to powwow with Gomez and Jesse. There was no GPS tracking on the rental van, but they’re sure Walt buried the money – and better still, Walt doesn’t know there’s no GPS tracking on the van.
At the car wash, Skyler is teaching Walt Jr. how to run the cash register and teaching him the dumb slogan. Saul comes in to have his car cleaned and Skyler becomes visibly nervous while Walt Jr. is awestruck that the lawyer on the billboard has come in to have his car washed. Walt walks in with Holly and walks back out before he’s noticed. When he gets back to his car, Walt confronts Saul about showing up there. Saul’s wearing a bulletproof vest because his bodyguard, Huell, has disappeared and he thinks Jesse has killed him. Walt dismisses him, but when he goes into the office, he gets a picture of an open black barrel of money. And right after that, Jesse finally gets in contact with him, telling him he’s found all seven barrels of money.
Jesse is threatening to burn the money over the phone and Walt is panicking. He’s driving like a crazy person out to the money, while reminding Jesse of all the things he’s done for him. He reminds of him the gangbangers he ran over, how he killed Emilio and Krazy-8. He says he’s sorry about Brock, but all Jesse says is that Walt is not sorry, but he will be. When Walt finally makes it out to where he buried the money, Jesse’s not there. Climbing up onto a ridge, he notices a car driving out to his location.
He calls Todd’s Uncle to tell him that Jesse is coming for him, giving him the coordinates of his location so that they can complete the hit. When the car finally shows up and he realizes it’s not only Jesse, but Hank and Gomez too, he tells Todd’s Uncle emphatically not to come before hanging up. Hank calls for Walt to come out and, lacking any other options, Walt complies with that command and all other ones that Hank gives him – culminating in Walter-fucking-Heisenberg-White finally being in handcuffs like he deserves.
Showing him the picture of the open barrel of money they sent Walt to put him in this crazed frenzy, Hank laughs and tells him it’s buried out by the barbeque in his backyard. Jesse realizes that this is the first place they ever cooked meth and Hank asks Walt to point out the spot where he buried the money. When Walt doesn’t, Hank gives him his Miranda rights and Walt calls him a coward. Jesse looked so relieved that Walt was finally in handcuffs and actually spit on Walt. They lunge at each other and have to be separated, with Jesse going to sit in Walt’s car while Walt is put into the SUV they arrived in.
Gomez offers to stay with Jesse at the site while they wait for a search team, while Hank takes Walt in. Hank calls Marie to tell her the good news – they got him – and they’re both so fucking happy it hurts. He reminds her it’s going to be rough for the next couple weeks, but they’ll get better and she agrees she’s so much better now. And then that all goes to shit because we can’t ever be happy and Todd’s Uncle shows up with his crew, starting a fire fight with Hank and Gomez, who are hiding behind the SUV while it’s getting shot up with Walt inside.
And that’s it. That’s the end of the episode. Jesse is relatively unseen and unscathed in Walt’s car off in the distance, but come on. If Hank dies, I’m going to riot – Gomez is going to die I’m sure. There’s only three episodes left and who do you realistically think is going to make it out of this intact? Not the audience, that’s a given.
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